MAKLANI - Close My Eyes

You're sitting beside me,
Scrolling through your phone.
I'm learning how to miss you while
You're home.
We used to talk till sunrise.
Now we just save the nights.
Two coffee cups, one conversation going cold on sight.
I keep waiting for the version of you I remember.
Some days I still find him.
Most days I don't close my eyes,
Hoping tonight feels different.
Close my eyes, half wanting to forget it.
I still reach for you under the covers,
Even though we're not lovers.
No, I close my eyes.
Don't know what I'm looking for.
You said you'd call me Tuesday.
It's Friday and I'm fine.
I've gotten good at reading all the silence in your lines.
I laugh at things that hurt now,
I've made a science of it.
Wearing calm like armor so you'll never see me quit.
I keep waiting for the version of you I remember.
Some days I still find him.
Most days I don't close my eyes,
Hoping tonight feels different.
Close my eyes, half wanting to forget it.
I still reach for you under the covers,
Even though we're not lovers.
No, I close my eyes.
Don't know what I'm looking for.
Baby, love was never supposed to feel
Like holding my breath just to keep it real.
Maybe I've been asking the dark for a sign,
But the answer's been sitting quietly in my mind.
Close my eyes, hoping tonight feels different.
Close my eyes, half wanting to forget it.
I still reach for you under the covers,
Even though we're not lovers.
No, I close my eyes.
Don't know what I'm looking for.
Looking for.